Living life between a rock and a hard place
Insulting names hurled like stones
The heart turns to steel, caged like a captured animal - defenceless
You learn to put on stone armour to hide behind
Fighting back only makes things worse
Having no place go, no one to turn to
No friends for support, but so desperately seeking
There was no rest not at school, not at home.
Last again, but I knew that was coming, my place already predetermined
Back of the pack again and again
The ump calls batter up, instead I am battered up
Dodging the balls hurdled at me was a daily game I was forced to play
I am out before I reach first plate; in fact I was out before the game started
Why me, why am I always the target
No angels in my outfield, to save and protect me
Where were all the responsible adults at my greatest time of need?
As I sit and learn my ABCs and 123s, I am surrounded by the cruelty of life
The teachers correct my work but, they never really help me
The classrooms were filled to capacity, but yet I was all alone
I am frozen in time from all the cold shoulders
Taunted and haunted to no end
Nothing changes as life passes by, hiding from the pain of abuse
Constantly trashed and then recycled over and over again
When you want to find me, just look in my favourite hiding place.
I wish I would have been able to tell them to take a hike or fly a kite
The bulling inflicted was like bullets fired into my heart
Life was like playing a game of hide and seek, where I hid and no one seeks me
Encapsulated in a world that I so desperately wanted to escape
Each day brought the same old, same old; again and again until you believed it was the only way
On a scale of 1 to 10, my life was a "0"
The torture was so great I felt like I was living in hell
Escaped at last with no desire to go back – no more repeat visits for me.
Who ever came up with the saying "Sticks and stones may break your bones but names will never hurt you", never lived a life like mine, as the names did hurt, a very deep lasting hurt.
A description of how things were oh so many years ago: J M H - 2010
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