A Story Of An Awakening

A Story Of An Awakening
Taken from Zen and the Art of Walking Lightly
Published Bright Star Canada
Amazon.com

Let me set the stage a bit.

• We are born.

• We come onto the face of this planet and into this world.

• Our parents and family have hopes and aspirations for us.

• We have God given talents, wants, likes and dislikes.

• We have gender.

• We have thought.

• We have vision. Or at least so we think.

Ideally, through our infancy, we are totally dependent on others for everything. Just as it should be, and as a result we became totally dependable for others infants (our children primarily) as they move through their initiation period childhood and out into their adulthood.

Next, life’s design seems to want to preserve itself; the physical seems first and foremost on the agenda.

This is accomplished by doing things like avoiding violence, if possible, or at least minimizing it, or providing food, shelter and clothing for ourselves.

Preserving the Self is a life long process but as we become efficient at doing so some of us naturally come to a point where we awaken onto ourselves. Not into us, but onto us, there is a difference.

It seems clear that this awakening process is twofold.

Our deeper eyes open one at a time.

At The First Awakening, one eye opens and then it sees. It sees pain, it sees happiness, it sees injustice and fairness, it sees good fortune and bad, and for a period of time what it sees is overwhelming. Each of us comes with a built in remedy; this onboard system is designed to cushion the load of First Sight. It’s called the Ego.

The Ego:

• has a job.

• defines everything for us.

• fits things into slots.

• claims to understand things, that if you really think about it, aren't really so understandable. Note, we feel safer when we think we understand something.

• sets up our belief and disbelief systems. They are separate systems and the latter is probably more powerful then the first.

• sets out how we can get those childhood dependency needs met. The needs that in a perfect world would have been met in childhood. Way back when we were supposed to be properly dependent upon properly dependable people.

• becomes our sword and shield.

But over time as the Ego evolves it generally sets into motion a series of events or a set of circumstances that bring us back to our unfinished spiritual business.

It does this because it believes it Knows, and this appearing to Know seems to be accidental not coincidental.

This is referred to as the coincidence of Karma.

The Ego should not be given credit for bringing us back to our unfinished business because this process of facing our unfinished business is often as not, the very thing the ego was trying to protect and shield us from. Why?

• The ego is an effect not a cause.

Lama Guendun Rinpoche writes:

Happiness is not to be found with many efforts or will

But is here, nearby, in your relaxing and surrendering.

Don't worry; there is nothing to be done.

Everything that comes up to your mind has no importance because it has no reality.

Don't conceive any attachment for it.

Don't judge yourself.

Let it be.

Let it come up and down without changing a thing.

It all vanishes and begins again, endlessly.

Nothing but the quest for happiness prevents us from seeing it.

It is like a rainbow that one is always chasing without ever reaching it.

It is because it has no existence.

It has always been here and goes with you all the time.

Don't believe in the reality of experiences, good or bad.

They are like rainbows.

Because we want to grasp what is not to be grasped,

We exhaust our strength in vain.

As soon as we relinquish our hold, space is here, open, welcoming and; comfortable.

So, do enjoy it.

Everything is yours already.

Stop searching.

Don't go into the jungle to look for the elephant that is quietly waiting for you at home.

There is nothing to do.

There is nothing to force.

There is nothing to desire.

And all comes by itself.

Exercise

The Exercise -
Lists Of Things That I Do

There are things that we can do that can make us feel more alive. Basically we have to choose to do them. In doing them, we tend to have periods when we forget everything else, we get out of our minds, even if it is just for short spaces in time, it matters not. It is refreshing just to be somewhere else consciously.

Depending on who we are and where we are and what we have access to, all sorts of things can be a part of this happening for us. Everything or anything from skiing to sex to meditation to doing dishes can be the cause. It really does not matter. The point is, at the conclusion of the exercise we may feel tired, but it is a good tired. We have reached a place within us where we optimized our experience. We enjoyed what we did, and felt like we grew just a little bit because of the experience.

• List those activities that set this in motion for you.

• Think well into your past as well as in the present.

• Take your time.

Considering that everything in the universe is in balance, then there must be an opposite pole to balance the above idea. Next consider those experiences that tend to deaden or bore you, that tend to leave you feeling “dragged-out” and tired, listless.

Most would think that it is an understatement to suggest that we would avoid these activities or would prefer not to do them but we engage in them for other covert reasons. For some of us they stand as bastions of complacent contempt, a place familiar, not likeable, just familiar and therefore seemingly safe.

The Rules Of The Exercise

As you begin to examine the various activities you may find that the various activities may seem to want to change from list to list, it is ok to do that, just let the various lists develop as you work on the exercise.

List all those activities that make you feel less vital and all those activities that make you feel alive.

Make two columns, A & B.

Again, think well back into the past as well as the present.

Take your time.

Next

1) Define for yourself how much conscious effort you have made in your most recent past¾the last six months say¾to re shape your world into the place that is full of “more alive” and contains less of “dragged out”

Now Comes The Work. Be Honest.

Remember You Can’t Make Things Different By Keeping Them The Same.

2) Describe those efforts you have made to change your life in this direction.

3) What is it in you that resists your effort to reshape your life?

4) What is it inside of you that prevents you from reshaping your life?

5) What is it outside of you that prevents you from reshaping your life? Don’t blame others, just be honest with yourself.

6) So ask yourself: why do you not spend more time with the "A" list and why can’t you spend less time on your "B" list?